All Matters Under the Heavens 天下事

The Chinese language is beautiful. Take for instance the phrase 望子成龙, the meaning is “one wishes for one’s children to be successful,” but the literal translation is “hope son becomes dragon.” (In today’s non-sexist China, the female version is hope daughter becomes phoenix.)

Let us touch upon the differences between Chinese and American cultures.
As I mentioned earlier, we had a guest lecturer who spoke about the changing role of Confucianism in Chinese society. One of the aspects of Chinese culture that he focused on was the role of family in Chinese society. Unlike in America, a person does not view themselves (and they are not viewed by others) as an individual standing alone on an island. Rather, a person is defined and judged based on their relationships with their family. When there is an interaction between the government and a person, it is not Mr. Tannenbaum vs. the Government, but it is the Tannenbaum family vs. the Government. Parents are often viewed as more important than children, including grandchildren. Parents have years of experience and should be respected. We did a little survey in our class. The question was, if an American adult had a child and a parent who could not swim, both were drowning, and you could only save one, who would it be? The students agreed that most Americans would pick their children over their parents (don’t worry Mommy and Daddy, I would save you too!). The reasoning behind it is that grandparents would prefer their grandchildren saved, but more interestingly, American society views the preservation of a young life to be more important than that of an old life. We tend to view the elderly as near to death; however, when we look at the youth, we focus on the multitude of years ahead of them. Our Chinese teacher on the other hand, said most Chinese would save their parents over their children. They place a greater value on the elderly, because they focus on the wisdom and knowledge the elderly have, which can only be accumulated over many years. This is similar to the dilemma I presented earlier; do you call someone a soon to be junior, or a student who just finished sophomore year. Your frame of thought is essential in shaping your opinions, and even your biases, even though the fact itself does not change. When we try to value a person, do we focus on all the opportunities that are ahead of them (for example, next year he is going to Cornell!), or do we focus on their past experiences (last year she traveled the world)? Unlike in accounting, our society does not have a consistent method for this type of valuation. Instead, we pick and choose our methods to obtain results that will justify our original assumptions. I too am a victim of my own humanity. Yet why would I want to fight against the human plight when we were designed to feel most comfortable when we are part of the pack?

“Is it perfume from a dress
That makes me so digress?” 1

Another discussion we had in class related to the differing views of consumption held by Americans and Chinese. Our textbook used two phrases to stereotype these two cultures. “Children and grandchildren make their own fortunes/way” exemplified the American concept, and “early generations plant the trees under which later generations rest” was the Chinese stereotype. I asked my Chinese teacher if a very rich Chinese parent dies, does he leave all of his money to his children, or only a sufficient quantity to live on (this is for example Bill Gate’s plan). She explained that the Chinese feel that since their families are their top priority, they will not give their money to a charity. Wealthy American families often give their children plenty of assets to live on, but the children do not inherent 100% of the family’s wealth. The goal of these two sets of parents is the same, they both want the best for their children, but their methods of providing their children with the best lifestyle varies greatly. I mentioned that Americans do not want to spoil their children. They believe in the value of hard work, so it is not out of greed that they do not always share their wealth with their children, but rather because they love them. My teacher said it is slowly becoming a problem in China that the children of very wealthy families inherit enormous fortunes and companies which they proceed to run to the ground. My best explanation for the differing methods is that China is still a developing country. China’s middle class, although now growing, did not exist some 10 years ago. Poorer families do not have the option of buying their children a brand new BMW to replace the one they recently crashed. I think the differing concepts of consumption also arise from the fact that China’s economy is still developing. If you cannot use credit cards to buy expensive train tickets, how are you supposed to accumulate debt? I’m not entirely sure if differing views of consumption arise from culture differences or rather from convenience and accessibility. Maybe one day we will discover our differences are not born from our cultures but rather from the gap in time created by wealth and modernity. Maybe one day, China will be the new America. Maybe some day, the Chinese will be saying, “Hi, my name is 贾文萱, and I am addicted to credit cards.”

1 T.S. Eliot “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock”